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update

I want to thank everybody for all your support over the years. My symptoms have become much worse over the last week. It has become obvious that time is getting shorter. I am of sound mind but not of sound body.



Morphine and pain go hand in hand lately.



The time has come where I can't have visitors unless you call and I know you well. There are some memorial panels being planned at some of the upcoming conventions You can see my urn. And the fire company in Smithtown NY where I’ve been a member for many years there will be celebration of my life open invite.



Please contact jbadgerssister when the time comes.

I don’t know if I’ll pass through this difficult time, or if it will get me at this point at this week. I might not see June.

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  • Sun, 19:53: Snuggles needed for bad days like today Depends. Uggg. Well 1 miss three hits

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  • Thu, 18:21: Is the end getting closer? Yes, It's math but who knows what date that means. Likely June to August

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  • Mon, 08:39: Wishing everyday was great but sometimes they are not

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  • Tue, 10:36: Dad traveling up for a visit. Napping now lunch later

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life update living with cancer

So this week the hospice doctor was here to talk about blunt topics like end of life and time lines along with other topics.

Death could come i the form of sudden death for me at any time, maybe that would be a 5 % chance. This was already expected that I would have been dead, none of the doctors thought I would be alive.


Slow decline could happen anytime and hospice would help me go easily as can be done.

I will die from this cancer but no one can tell how or when. When I asked other doctors about these questions it was like really hard to get answers but Dr. C was blunt and honest. I do like that better. But the answers have been about the same.


In the mean timer radiation was talked about again up here in New Hampshire. Dr. C would take care of the radiation referral with a doctor P. Since this seems to help me we would continue hopefully.

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Update of the last two weeks

It has been a long 10 days since my transport and radiation.

The radiation went fine on March 17th, 18th but the transport back on the 18th was. I think that crew hit every wall and post in the hospital on the way out. One scape on the foot started to be trouble over the next couple of days.. I was unable to place my foot down over the side of the bed Sunday after the long transport.

On the transport from my brothers in the fire department, it was quite emotional for me. A group or about 22 cheered me off as I was wheeled into the rig for transport. Not only that, when I got to Epping anther group of people stopped by that was in the area.

It was one of the memories in my life that will be on top for a while now.


Back to me and my right leg. Well the right leg started to get really red, hot the touch an painful I had a slight temperature Monday above my baseline but still not a fever. Tuesday however this was worse. The on-call nurse was called and checked out of hospice care, called 911 and got transported to Exerter Hospital. By the time I got there the red on my leg was above my hip, and my temperature was 102. The discharge notes say acute right leg cellulitis, likely Streptococcal. Drugs used: Zosyn and vancomycin but stopped Vancomycin 3/25 as his MRSA screen is negative and blood cx NGTD after more than 48hrs of treatment. Fever trend improving although WBC still mildly elevated but has other reasons for this. Clinically improving. Zosyn changed to Keflex on 3/26 with continued improvement and will complete a 10 day course. I did now want my welcome to New Hampshire to be in hospital, but felt I had no choice on Tuesday. Oral meds at that pint would not have worked and death was possible. Anther few hours the infection would not have been reversible. I am not quite ready to hang it up but that choice was given to me, just morphine and die.

I am glad I am still here but quality of life is somewhat better, I can now walk short distances again. The edema in my legs are at a all time low for the last two weeks, the redness is gone from the right leg and slightly pink now. Side effects though of Keflex, bathroom visits are interesting.

For the next two days my brother and sis-in in Philli to visit family and /i have 24 care here until Saturday. A really nice day here and warm enough to have the windows open and fresh breeze.


Moving on I am now out of the hospital at my brother's house. Visitors welcome. I am up for visits in the afternoon but I do get sleepy. Use droodle

I should post some pictures to flikr

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